Are you Suffering the Trauma of Abusive Relationship? Know the Ways to Overcome from it!
Relationships are the core of any human life. Be it with your parents, siblings, friends, or better half, relationships are present in every sphere of life. Relationships may take many forms. Some of them may help you to move forward in life, while others may turn out abusive in the long run.
Too many limitations, control, jealousy, and possessiveness are abusive relationship signs. Emotionally abusive relationships and physically abusive relationships are all taxing for a person.
When you are going through an abusive relationship, the most common advice thrown in your way would be “this would get better,” “just leave him/her,” “you should do it for your kids,” etc.
Such advice may lead to more confusion or frustration as you may know what to do to get out of the abusive relationship, but such advice acts as roadblocks on your way to making a concrete decision.
A psychological perspective to getting rid of the abusive relationship involves a series of analyses based on questions like What’s happening and how do you change it? Has this happened before, and how did you create this situation in the first place? Exploring the situation further and dissecting your emotions is the first step to move on from an abusive relationship.
To make it easier to combat an abusive relationship, here are a few steps you can use.
Explore your fear
Most abusive relationships are shrouded by fear, and it awards you more fear each time you decide to analyze the relationship. The situation that you are in is real, and so is the level of fear around you. But what are the things you fear now? Most fears are about the consequences of moving out.
What if your partner breaks down? What if you break down? What if they mistreat their future partners? What if they show anger on your children or their friends? How will you survive on your own?
These fears end up in behaviours such as denial of moving out and accepting your abusive relationship, which only hurts you more and hinders your growth. Such fears keep your abuser in control and to move on, and the first step is to challenge the abuser and remove them out of control. Changing your perspective on fear is the first solution.
You need to know that fear is not wrong. In fact, it is a defence mechanism that warns you of something wrong. It tries to protect you, and it is completely normal to fear an abusive relationship. Listen to it, but never allow it to affect or make the decisions for you. Write down your fears and try to write one solution for each.
Your fears and solutions could be:
“I won’t be able to cope alone.”
Think over who you were before, during, and after the abusive relationship. Think over the struggles you faced in the relationship and see how you have survived through it. You may have problems in paying, purchasing, managing emotions and standing on your own legs. But you will survive because adversity is the mother of invention, and humans have the capacity to find out solutions. You will, too; you need to believe in it.